Pic of Simon Edhouse
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 2.19pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Logo Design
Hello David,
I would like to catch up as I am working on a really exciting
project at the moment and need a logo designed. Basically something
representing peer to peer networking. I have to have something to show
prospective clients this week so would you be able to pull something
together in the next few days? I will also need a couple of pie charts
done for a 1 page website. If the deal goes ahead there will be some
good money in it for you.
Simon
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 3.52pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Logo Design
Dear Simon,
Disregarding the fact that you have still not paid me for work I
completed earlier this year despite several assertions that you would do
so, I would be delighted to spend my free time creating logos and pie
charts for you based on further vague promises of future possible
payment. Please find attached pie chart as requested and let me know of
any changes required.
Regards, David.
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 4.11pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Logo Design
Is that supposed to be a fucking joke? I told you the previous
projects did not go ahead. I invested a lot more time and energy in
those projects than you did. If you put as much energy into the projects
as you do being a dickhead you would be a lot more successful.
From: David Thorne
Date: Monday 16 November 2009 5.27pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Dear Simon,
You are correct and I apologise. Your last project was actually both
commercially viable and original. Unfortunately the part that was
commercially viable was not original, and the part that was original was
not commercially viable.
I would no doubt find your ideas more 'cutting edge' and original if
I had traveled forward in time from the 1950's but as it stands, your
ideas for technology based projects that have already been put into
application by other people several years before you thought of them
fail to generate the enthusiasm they possibly deserve. Having said that
though, if I had traveled forward in time, my time machine would
probably put your peer to peer networking technology to shame as not
only would it have commercial viability, but also an awesome logo and
accompanying pie charts.
Regardless, I have, as requested, attached a logo that represents
not only the peer to peer networking project you are currently working
on, but working with you in general.
Regards, David.
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 11.07am
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
You just crossed the line. You have no idea about the potential this
project has. The technology allows users to network peer to peer, add
contacts, share information and is potentially worth many millions of
dollars and your short sightedness just cost you any chance of being
involved.
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 1.36pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Dear Simon,
So you have invented Twitter. Congratulations. This is where that time machine would definitely have come in quite handy.
When I was about twelve, I read that time slows down when
approaching the speed of light so I constructed a time machine by
securing my father's portable generator to the back of my mini-bike with
rope and attaching the drive belt to the back wheel. Unfortunately,
instead of traveling through time and finding myself in the future, I
traveled about fifty metres along the footpath at 200mph before finding
myself in a bush. When asked by the nurse filling out the hospital
accident report "Cause of accident?" I stated 'time travel attempt' but
she wrote down 'stupidity'.
If I did have a working time machine, the first thing I would do is
go back four days and tell myself to read the warning on the hair
removal cream packaging where it recommends not using on sensitive
areas.
I would then travel several months back to warn myself against
agreeing to do copious amounts of design work for an old man wielding
the business plan equivalent of a retarded child poking itself in the
eye with a spoon, before finally traveling back to 1982 and explaining
to myself the long term photographic repercussions of going to the
hairdresser and asking for a haircut exactly like Simon LeBon's the day
before a large family gathering.
Regards, David.
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 3.29pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
You really are a fucking idiot and have no idea what you are talking
about. The project I am working on will be more successful than twitter
within a year. When I sell the project for 40 million dollars I will
ignore any emails from you begging to be a part of it and will send you a
postcard from my yaght. Ciao.
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 3.58pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.10pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Anyone else would be able to see the opportunity I am presenting but
not you. You have to be a fucking smart arse about it. All I was asking
for was a logo and a few pie charts which would have taken you a few
fucking hours.
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.25pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Dear Simon
Actually, you were asking me to design a logotype which would have
taken me a few hours and fifteen years experience. For free. With pie
charts. Usually when people don't ask me to design them a logo, pie
charts or website, I, in return, do not ask them to paint my apartment,
drive me to the airport, represent me in court or whatever it is they do
for a living. Unfortunately though, as your business model consists
entirely of "Facebook is cool, I am going to make a website just like
that", this non exchange of free services has no foundation as you offer
nothing of which I wont ask for.
Regards, David.
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 4.43pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
What the fuck is your point? Are you going to do the logo and charts for me or not?
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.02pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.13pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Do not ever email me again.
From: David Thorne
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.19pm
To: Simon Edhouse
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Ok. Good luck with your project. If you need anything let me know.
Regards, David.
From: Simon Edhouse
Date: Tuesday 17 November 2009 5.27pm
To: David Thorne
Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Logo Design
Get fucked.
ahahhahah, awesome
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