Saturday, October 2, 2010


Ok, so a few weeks back I got busted for getting out of a taxi in Manhattan, NY with a brewsky. I was a little drunk so at first I thought the cop was pointing at my super sweet suitcase when he said... "You know you can't have that in the street." ...I was like... "Erm OK weirdo I know I look like a cross between Peewee Herman and a homeless person, but even I can afford this top of the range Samsonite wheely roller thing."...He was super confused and replied with... "Are you mocking me?"...I came straight back with a right hooker and said... "Don't get me wrong, everything's for sale mate, you wanna buy it?" Then he got really mad and looked at his partner and said "Ticket him." The whole time I totally forgot that I was drinking a beer in front him and his partner Buttface McBallnuts. Anyways...long story short, I got slam dunked biker style for 25 bones. It took me about 3 hours to find this stupid form online so here it is. Keep it safe because if you ever try and sell a pissed off cop a suitcase it's a bitch to find.
ps. After that incident I then freaked out all night in the bar thinking someone was going to steal my suitcase for some unknown reason.
pps. Never take a suitcase to a bunch of bars if you freak about people stealing said suitcase.

Funnily enough the same happened to me and always seems to everytime I go to Brooklyn. The suitcase bit, not the drink ticket. Lugging the bloody thing up and down stairs in the subway then from bar to bar, always keeping one eye out for it. It's handy though if you need to change your underpants, or something, half way through the night. And my wheelie case is Swiss and twice the size of Deans. Ha.


  1. hahahaha
    this is the best story dude

  2. Respect man "o" man sure is a bummer in land of the free! think i will stay in ol europe:-)At least you had the gut,s to speak up to the bastards.

  3. good times, wait till next year, hahaha

    and "i told you not to smoke!"